Peace I Give Unto You

I had the news on this morning and an interview was taking place with a famous country singer who I really enjoy. So I sat in front of the television to listen to what they were saying. The kids had just gotten on the bus and I was picking up the morning mess. A beautiful lady that has one child and just announced that she was having another and they were asking her questions around this topic. From everything I've seen in the past, she's a down to earth, religious, family oriented person. One thing that came out in the interview was that she had had three miscarriages before this pregnancy, and she had struggled with that. I totally understood this, as I've had miscarriages in the past and the grieving that comes with loosing a child when no one even knows that you were pregnant to begin with, is hard. It's hard to grieve alone and put a smile on your face in front of your friends.

Anyways, she was saying how this one night she thought she was having her fourth miscarriage. Her husband was gone, it was night time, and she went to lay by her son and she prayed like she had never prayed before. Pleading and sobbing with God, that she realized how blessed she was but she couldn't understand why he would keep letting her get pregnant but loose the baby. She said, she never had gotten angry but that night she did get angry. She said, "just shut the door or let me have a kid." She said, for the first time she felt like she had told God how she felt and that she feels like were supposed to do that. On Monday she went to the doctor and found out everything with the baby was fine and she felt like God had heard her. Not that he hadn't in the past but He heard her.

This got me thinking, and I'm assuming she didn't mean it this way; So does God only answer our prayers when we get what we prayed for? Does He only hear us when He answers with what we asked for? This is where Faith, Trust, and Peace come in.

3 Nephi 18:20

And whatsoever ye shall ask the Father in my name, which is right, believing that ye shall receive, behold it shall be given unto you.

John 14:26-27

But the Comforter, which is the Holy Ghost, whom the Father will send in my name, he shall teach you all things, and bring all things to your remembrance, whatsoever I have said unto you.

Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you: not as the world giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.

I shared this a couple weeks ago at Stake Conference. The first time I was diagnosed with cancer in 2002, I was alone in the doctors office when he told me I had cancer. I just laughed; I'm sure I was shocked. I couldn't believe what he was saying. I didn't even know what to ask. I had just had a baby 6 weeks earlier. I had four little kids at home. My oldest had just started Kindergarten. He gave me the run down for what would be happening next, told me he was sorry and sent me home. It wasn't until I was driving past CBC that it hit me. I started sobbing. All these questions and worries flooded my mind. I had an open communication with God as I drove home that day. I was driving home on 395 when I hit the intersection where Booker Auction is located and these words were whispered to heart, "You know who you are and you know where you're going." I have heard those words many times, but never had they brought as much peace to me as they did at that time. Like the scripture above states, "my peace I give unto you: not as the world giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid." There was a wave of peace that came over me that no one else, not my mom or dad, sister, best friend, even my husband, could have helped me feel in that moment.  Heavenly Father had heard me and I knew it because of the peace I felt through the Holy Ghost. I was no longer afraid of what was to come.

Since that time, I've been diagnosed several times with cancer. I have Faith and Trust in Him and with that Trust and Faith, I have felt His Peace over and over again in my life. He has blessed me with a loving, faithful and supportive husband, kids that try and love each other. We are far from the perfect family but as long as we keep trying and moving forward, isn't that all that he asks? I'm grateful for a family who tries. 

https://youtu.be/DwY2EpAgW-M

The link above is my cousin Dallin McAllister singing the hymn: Where Can I Turn For Peace